- 21 Feb 2020
- Reading time
- 3 minutes
Everyone at some point will have ordered a product online only to be deeply disappointed. It could be that the product description bares no relation to what you receive in the post, or even that the product has been smashed to smithereens.
Most people’s natural reaction is to look up the relevant customer service department and make a complaint, but there are those brave few who decide to go further and infuse their complaint or customer review with humor, or even outright art. Here are some of the very best, made by those who got more than they bargained for, or much less than they expected.
Here’s to hoping that those customers unfortunate enough to have suffered a 1-star experience were treated to gifts by the respective companies, such as sports free bets for a big game, discount codes and complementary tickets. It certainly isn't unheard of, with some customer service departments being so tickled by reviews that they've lavished everything from free crates of drinks cans to lifetime supplies of products to their authors!
Why is my Soccer Ball Flat?
Bizarrely, one of the most common complaints received by soccer ball manufacturers and sales outlets is that people are disappointed to find their ball arrives deflated, rather than fully inflated and ready to go. Amazon is littered with 1-star reviews that scream everything from, “My ball is flat,” to “How am I supposed to kick this?”
Hair Removal Brings the Burn
When it comes to reviews of hair removal cream, consumers have excelled themselves, extolling both the pluses and minuses of this most versatile of products which, despite clearly stating on its packaging that it is only appropriate for use on legs and chests, has been applied to more delicate areas of the anatomy by people both brave, stupid and hell-bent on self-destruction. Among some of the very best comments left by customers is one man claiming that the cream, “made my farts louder,” and another stating that the cream, when applied to his nether regions, felt as though he was being given a “barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.” At this point, reviews of hair removal cream have become their own literary sub-genre, and one that promises to flourish for as long as people risk it all to get that super smooth feeling in preparation for a vacation or even a night of passion.
For many, the invention of the beer helmet was unnecessary, a joke device that was neither functional nor aesthetically pleasing. However, those souls who did click ‘buy’ have never looked back, with one reviewer giving the helmet, straw and beer can holder combo 11 out of 10, proclaiming that his, “hands are free, whilst my alcohol consumption increases.”
Are you a Bidet Believer? Is there anything more luxurious than having your undercarriage washed for you from the comfort of your own throne? It seems that many lucky people who ordered this electric bidet toilet seat attachment had their eyes opened, and horizons broadened by the product. One such happy customer said he couldn’t believe he’d spent so long wasting money on toilet paper, whereas now he can enjoy the cost-effective, “cooling high-powered water pressure,” that those in the know have enjoyed for years.
Life Sized Cardboard Cut-Outs… Need We Say More?
Online shopping has brought about a new era of consumer behavior, with folk once satisfied buying the bare essentials at the general store now inspired to buy products both as useless as they are dumb. Life sized cardboard cut-outs of celebrities and sports stars, however, certainly do not fall into that category. After all, who wouldn’t want Tom Brady watching over you and your partner as you snuggle on the sofa, or have Danny DeVito stand at the foot of your bed, standing guard for eternity? That was what reviewer Jess Jolly thought when she said of her DeVito cut-out, “He is a good man. I am content at night knowing he watches me sleep.”
The next time you feel the urge to leave a review, good or bad, why not make someone’s day with a few lines that are both informative and entertaining?